maternity, Lompoc, babies, flowers, sunset, wings, vans, 2016
Dawn Kincade
Waiting for our boy....

Whitney and Kevin are awaiting the birth of their first child.

Waiting for our boy....

sunflowers

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My Real Highlight Reel...My Word for 2023

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The end of the year always brings highlights from the year we're leaving with bright hopes for the year ahead. I always love to see what those highlights look like and when I get ready to do mine, I'm always disappointed by what the algorithm chose for my "highlights." It's always difficult for an app to know what made my day and what got a lot of likes. In my economy, likes don't always equate to making my heart happy.

As I closed out the year, my word for 2022 was the noun version of Resolve-firm determination to do something. Similar words to resolve are braveness~courage~spunk~steadfastness~persistence

I'm looking back fondly because this word was the very essence of my year. I was persistent in understanding grief and all of the things that grief has taught me. I spent the year taking the information I've learned over several years of loss, pursuing what I've gleaned, and getting the training with the grief recovery method that has me moving into the next thing God has for me.

I've decided on my word for 2023 and just ordered my one little word piece.

My Word for 2023 is Inspire - to influence or impel, to give inspiration to, to produce or arouse (a feeling, thought, etc.). Other similar words are educate-enrich-enlighten-transform-nurture. As I move into 2023 with newfound information on grief and loss, I hope to Inspire others to feel their feelings and to process and complete their losses. I’m wondering…what is your word for 2023?? Happy New Year!!

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Just a few of the highlights of 2019

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I often wonder what the highlights look like when you're a photographer. Is it the number of clients you had? or is it by how you've improved over the previous year? Maybe it is the number of followers you've acquired, and yet for some, it may be the amount of money you made. My highlights are the ones that make me smile on days when I’m unsure if there is a smile left in me. They are the highlights that bring back the sights, sounds, and smells of that moment.

We live in an age now, where everyone is a "photographer." Just one click gives you the ability to capture a moment. So this grouping of photos is my highlight reel. The images that helped me tell the story of 2019 for me. I captured a lot of babies and mommas. I saw families grow, and I saw young adults enter onto the pathway of adulthood. I enjoyed events and traveled hither and yon, but in all of that, I found a deep-rooted passion for telling the stories of life. I'm grateful for that and I hope you'll join me as I venture into 2020 with an ever-increasing passion and an ever-growing desire to communicate through photographs.

The several photos in this gallery I didn’t take but I am in them which is rare for those who are behind the camera. The last photo is the ever-present reminder that Evan is part of every highlight reel and that we miss him EVERY SINGLE DAY!

Happiest of New Year as we move into the next decade!

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Sunflowers and what they're teaching me...

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We are just a few weeks away from the start of Fall. It’s hard to imagine that when we have days that the temperature is close to 100 degrees but by the ticking of time the calendar inches closer to the date that signifies to us that cooler weather and falling leaves is around the corner. There is something that always tugs in me as we say so long to summer and welcome the coming of fall. I’m kinda a big fan of most of the seasons but fall and spring are usually my favorites. Spring as it brings the beauty of new birth after a winter of loss. Summer is filled with long days in the sun and warm evenings of smooth conversations. Fall brings with it the vibrant changes in nature and for me it was always a time to plan for significant milestones as it is my birthday season and the birth dates for my boys. 

Much of the joy and excitement of fall has changed for me since Evan’s death. There is almost this resistance/hesitance to slow down the movement of time. I can’t really explain it other than fall was always such a great season for me but I have sustain such a significant amount of loss during this season I want to stay parked in summer indefinitly. The reason being is maybe not so obvious to most but summer is easier. There are no time constraints. The days are longer the nights are shorter and the sunflowers are blooming. All of it doesn’t remind me that soon you will need to start walking towards fall. Because fall holds with its beauty a measure of pain. 

This year in my travels the process of this beauty for ashes was much more evident for me as I watched the transformation of my beloved sunflowers. If you follow me even a little you know I start my search for sunflowers in early May as they are just starting the growing season here locally. I try hard to extend my watch through the summer but this year I went out to some of the fields as they were dying. The significance of the dying process for sunflowers is just as important as the beauty they bring to us as we drive by the fields. It permitted me to be fully part of the loss of these flowers and to understand the great impact they have in their beauty and in their dying. 

Today, September 9th. 2018,  which is 22 months since Evan's death and is a few months shy of what would be his 28th birthday. Alex and I will celebrate our birthdays next month. The Earth will keep spinning. The trees will change and days will get shorter. But what I wonder does the significance of Evan’s life that was so vibrant when he was living continue in his dying?? Does the impact he made continue even though he isn’t here to have his voice heard? As I ponder those things I think of the beautiful sunflowers.  

https://www.davisenterprise.com/local-news/yolo-grows-sunflower-seeds-for-the-world/

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Putting Your Art Out There.....

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This week has been full of preparations for an art show I am doing this weekend. It has been exciting, creative, at moments challenging and most certainly a process of learning. Photography has become a passion for me....from capturing the moment~composing the shot~editing the photo~printing it~enjoying it. The photography art show will be at a local seasonal and pet store. They have a lovely nursery that they have opened up for me to display my art and invite people to enjoy it. It is such a perfect spot for my floral and landscape photos. I am grateful that they enjoy my art and are willing to let me display it to the public. 

This last weekend was Mother's Day and my kids took the opportunity to take me out to do the thing that I love and that is photograph. That adventure I will have to blog about at another time.  It really was one of the best Mother's Day.  Each of my sons wrote me a lovely sentiment expressing to me something that they had noticed or seen in me over the last year. One of the things they both mentioned was photography. They said that you put your art out for people to see and it really places you in a vulnerable position. You lay it out for all to see and some may not feel the feels you do about what you've created. Both of my sons spoke of my growth and my ability to persevere even in the midst of my vulnerability.  They see that I work very hard to capture the truth in the moments I capture. Their words really meant a lot and it gave me that extra boost of confidence to push through.

So with excitement and a bit of vunerability...I am jumping into the world of art. I thought I was just putting my toes in the water but I realize that I am knee deep and going in deeper. If you are near Sweet Pea's this Saturday evening I invite you to come see my photography art show. This Saturday May 14th, 5pm at Sweet Pea's Boutique ~ 891 Alamo Drive ~ Vacaville, CA.